Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
