That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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