just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
