I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
