What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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