And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
