I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Randomize
