Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I wish I could punch you in the face.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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