I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
