9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
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