Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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