do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Randomize
