I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize