Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
