By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
