playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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