dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
In other news, I just burned my penis
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
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