Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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