BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
