bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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