my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
