i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
