You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
The power of my boobs compel you
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
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