Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
