How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
The power of my boobs compel you
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Randomize
