We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
