def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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