my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
