Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
