let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
