This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
