let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
