Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Rumble strips road head = magical
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
