At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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