She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
