I want to walk on stilts...naked
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Randomize
