a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize