Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
