my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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