Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Randomize
