At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
