Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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