I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
