oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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