just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
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