he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
third nipple confirmed
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
