STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I need help removing her.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
