glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Randomize
