drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
