dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
