Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
He felt like a one man threesome
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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