He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
