NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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