You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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